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these are not. letters to people. stuff to be passed on as gossip or gospel. this is just my story. how i see things. history as it unfolds. life as it revolves. around me. around you. around us.

transitions

September 25, 2006

can anyone remember their most priced possesion during their childhood days?

mine was this small pillow. it was pink and rather fluffy. i call it my “babymallows” and can’t sleep without it.

up to know, “babymallows” is still alive. though it is already dressed in blue, babymallows still puts me to sleep. i don’t want to throw it away, cuz if i do, i’ll never have a sleep as good as babymallows puts me into.

i guess, i’m really not that grown-up yet - or i don’t want to grow up yet. its hard to tell. its funny how when i was a kid, i’ve always dreamed of being adult, i just couldn’t wait to grow up. now that i am, i’m wishing that i would stop aging. i envy the kids who have no problems to deal with, problems about life and love.

in fact, i’m kind of scared right now. i’m thinking of what will happen to me when i’m finally living by myself. of course, i would love the freedom, but who would take care of me? no one would be around to comfort me, especially during rainy nights (i am morbidly afraid of thunder and lightning) no one would be around to kill roaches and catch mice. no one would be around to cook for me. no one would be around to wash my clothes. it would be all up to me. its really scary, but its inevitable.

i hope i’ll be ready for it.

Posted by ayel at 10:19 pm | permalink

Previous Comments

Everyone has fears…. and you must face them. And not everyone wants the idea of being out of the "comfort zone". Even me, but one must get used to it, because that is life. It constantly changes. We have to live with it and respond…

Take care!

Posted by tina at September 27, 2006, 9:03 am

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